Oh well. Shit happens. I discovered I didn't give any fucks about the loss other then the desire to do a quick refit into something and get back out in space. I was a bit startled by my matter of fact lack of care. While ships explode and I fully expect it to happen, I find I am often disappointed that I didn't make what was wanted to happen happen. This time I was reminded of when I lost a Rifter to tackling a Drake for Ender, giving him the time he needed to break free and kill the drake.
On this occasion the FC asked me to aggress and see what happened. The Huginn pilot waited until I was in half armor to aggress back. The fleet came to save me but I died just as they landed on grid and before the reps could land. Oh well. It was a good try and for once I wasn't fretting when I was sent first to go and try to hold something down. In retrospect, I was rather calm and thoughtful about the entire engagement.
It reminds me about the fact that armor repairs are end of cycle and shield start of cycle. My Rupture couldn't hold up at the end. That was okay as well. Ships die and this one didn't die from something stupid that I or anyone else did so I walked away from it with the desire to reship and continue.
The boys have been out of late in a somewhat disorganized organized group where people log in and wander off to join whomever is floating about trying to kill people in space. I am terrible at inviting myself into situations. Public announcements for fleets make me happy. Sticking my head into a fleet to see if they mind me coming along leaves me somewhat nervous of rejection. Not they my boys have ever, ever rejected me. It's a me thing and I've been spending more time twiddling my thumbs then joining fleets of late. It's something I need to correct and be a bit more "Sugar is on the way rawr!". Also, it's a great chance to fly my Jaguars and try some new things. Moral: Self Invite until they kick me from fleet if they don't want me :P
Anyway, at the start they were running around in shield stuff but cruisers and battlecruisers. I undocked my Jaguar because my Jaguar is, I believe, my favorite ship and went to see if I could poke my fingers in their pie. I joined just as they were deciding to reship into armor and roam. I turned around but Diz and I got held up when Ren was met with a Vexor and Caracal playing gategames with him. After a moment of confusion we figured out where he was and went in for the kill.
The Vexor pilot went down and I tackled the Caracal. In my mind I thought missiles due to it being a Caldari boat and kept myself at the edge of my point range in a rapid orbit to negate missile damage and hopefully he had heavy assault missiles that wouldn't be able to reach me.
The Vexor went down and the Caracal popped. I went for the pod and to my surprise, point even with a fail misselection of my disruptor. Well, okay. I killed the pod but it seems that it didn't effect my sec status this time.
In local his friend goes, "You could have spared my mates pod :( " and I could only answer, "No. Not really after I caught it."
After that we roamed out. Space was pretty dead until the Huginn. I did kill a cyno noobship at some point. Then I died to the Huginn and purchased and fit up another ship and we headed back home. A quite night but a good night with a lot of things to think about on many levels.
I'm rather excited that I will be able to fly the Thorax and Vexor soon. T2 medium Hybrids are near. I'm still not loving the armor Rupture, I don't use missiles (they are on my do not like list) so a few new options will be fun.